Henry was informed in the late evening of Sept. 10 of the death of his older sister Ashley Lee, but Henry returned to Champaign for the 30-9 victory over Central Michigan on Saturday.

Matt Stevens, IlliniGuys Staff Writer

September 17, 2024

CHAMPAIGN, Ill. — Late in the evening on the night of Sept. 10, Aaron Henry looked down at his personal cell phone and instantly knew it wasn’t good news when he had notifications of nearly two dozen missed calls.

“It’s never easy anytime I get a phone call during the season. There was about 20 missed phone calls. I knew something was wrong,” the second-year Illinois defensive coordinator said to local media on Tuesday afternoon.

Ashley Lee, sister of Aaron Henry. Photo submitted by family of Ashley Lee to the James C. Boyd Funeral Home in Fort Myers Florida

It wasn’t long after returning the first call that Henry was informed his older sister Ashley Lee tragically died that night and the entirety of Henry’s family, which includes 10 siblings, was still trying to process the news. Almost all of Henry’s siblings and family reside in the Fort Myers, Fla. area, except for Henry himself as football (whether as a player or a coach) has forced him to move around the country from Fayetteville, Ark. to Raleigh, N.C. to Nashville, Tenn. and now to his residence in Savoy, Ill.

Ashley Lee, 39, and Henry were obviously close siblings as she was in attendance in Madison, Wis. to watch Henry graduate from the University of Wisconsin. Lee was the mother of four children ranging from 22 to 9 years old.

“I think the hardest part for me as her brother was you weren’t there,” Henry said Tuesday. “I just hope she knew she was loved when she did pass.”

The details of Ashley Lee’s death are still unknown at this time as the autopsy is slated to be performed this week before her visitation and funeral, which Henry will attend, on Saturday and Sunday in Fort Myers, Fla.

What is known is Henry needed help from folks inside the Smith Family Football Complex and inside his family to get through a challenging week of preparation for a game against Central Michigan and a short week of training for a Friday night contest at No. 22 Nebraska (7 p.m. CST, FOX).

Henry confirmed for at least a couple days last week fourth-year head coach Bret Bielema and defensive line coach Terrance Jamison, who was promoted to co-defensive coordinator in Dec. 2022, took over more responsibility in the game plan last week while Henry was quickly assisting his family with funeral preparations.

Henry will be getting on a red-eye flight to Florida to attend the visitation and funeral arrangements before coming back to Champaign-Urbana late Sunday to begin preparations for the Sept. 28 game at Penn State. Henry confirmed he’s been in contact with Bielema, who has known Henry since the former Badgers defensive coordinator and head coach recruited him from Immokalee (Fla.) High School to Wisconsin. Henry also said Illinois athletics director Josh Whitman and Illinois athletics chief operating officer Roger Denny to help arrange flights for Henry to be with his family in this tragic situation.

“That initial conversation when he came into my office was real late (on Sept. 10), probably after 10 p.m., and I didn’t know what was coming but I knew I had a person that I loved who was in a really tough spot,” Bielema said on Monday. “We probably talked for a half hour to walk and talk him through this. I give a lot of credit to Josh (Whitman) and his crew for what they’re doing. For the university to take care of some things has been able to put his mind at ease a little bit. I wanted to let (Henry) steer this. I met with the media and didn’t mention anything. After the game, I was able to give him a game ball and to see the reaction of our players to that was very awesome.”

Aaron Henry courtesy Matt Stevens, IlliniGuys

Bielema referenced Monday that he has handled the extremely emotional trauma of losing a sibling at a young age. While he was a football player at Iowa, only hours after the Hawkeyes won at Michigan in 1990 to put them on the path to the Rose Bowl, Bielema found out that his 27-year-old sister, Betsy, had died while doing charity work with underprivileged children in the Seattle area. A snake darted from under a rock and spooked a horse, which threw Betsy, who landed on her head. Henry is well aware of that tragic event in Bielema’s life because the then-Wisconsin head coach addressed it with his 2010 Badgers team when Henry was a player. After Wisconsin won, 48-28, Henry reportedly approached Bielema and said ‘your sister is watching, Coach.’.

“I can remember the first thing that came to my mind that (Sept. 10) night was when I was a child, my sister’s room and my room were right next to each other. She had twin beds in her room, and we were living with my grandmother and I used to get scared all the time as a kid and I would go into her bedroom. She would just comfort me. There’s a lot of peace in regards to her being gone because she was such a caretaker. It was difficult. It’s still been difficult.”

Henry also knew he and his wife Camille, would need some help from Florida to help get him through such an emotional period. Henry knew he had to call his dad. Roderick Lee arrived in Illinois and has been staying in Henry’s house until he returns to Florida on Thursday.

“He wasn’t going to come but well, I needed him,” Henry said. “I really feel bad for my nieces and nephews anytime you got some young babies that have to do something like that, to lose their mother. It’s very, very challenging but I’ve got a great support system.”

Upon hearing the news, Henry said Illinois’ first-year cornerbacks coach Corey Parker had the players in his position group bring their cell phones in the meeting room, usually a prohibited act for Illini players. The intention of calling a woman in their life who wasn’t a grandmother or mother, whether it was a sister or aunt or whoever, to let them know what they meant to their life.

Henry said Tuesday he’s still emotionally catching himself this week having moments where he’s still in some form of shock that his older sister isn’t alive anymore and her four children, Henry’s nieces and nephews, no longer can communicate with their mother.

“There were moments the days before the game, right before kickoff…I had one (Monday),” Henry said. “Piece by piece I’m finding myself in these moments where I’m like ‘I can’t believe this has happened.’